Monday, August 20, 2012

Weekend Wrap Up Back in Focus!

Hey Dolls!
I'm gonna start off real-
Today my heart hurts!
This weekend was a mix of emotions and I'm dealing with them all right now!
I do want to show the photos of a great time spent with family, but I also wanna be real about what's going on and remember this time.

I got out of focus!
To anyone who reads my blog- please don't ever think my life is a bag of candy and nothing goes wrong!
That's one false statement.
Yes- this blog highlights my life, and often highlights the positive, but there's plenty of negative too!

That's where I am today.
I did it- let myself fall too hard, too quick!
I got myself out of focus and was the one who got hurt!

It started with something trivial and something I'm updating this post to delete b/c it doesn't deserve more thought... but just know- it hurt!
But what hurt more- was that I could see that God used this to show me- "Stacy, you do NOT have your eyes focused on me! You need to realize what's important (Me) and put me back at the center- it will all fall back into place"

I spent a LOT of yesterday afternoon and evening in tears. Again, I wouldn't say it all stemmed from this situration- but it stemmed from what it represented. My sweet roommate who's always there for me reminded me the same thing my mom did- God still loves me.
Even tho I am continuing to struggle with that today and will for a few. I feel I've let Him down and that's what hurts my heart the most.
I went to visit with my mom last night b/c I needed some mommy time and I just told her, while I know that God knows we're not perfect and we will falter, I just wish I could hear Him say "I still love you!"
I have just prayed and prayed for peace and comfort in this and continue to say "Wrap your arms around me!" Even as I write that, I feel the peace, but Satan keeps poking his head thru in the doubt. 
So please I ask you to pray for me to help put God back in focus, but also to allow me to feel Him when Satan's trying to get the better of me!
**Also updating to thank God for using people around me, music and friends to tell me I love you and know you will make mistakes, but I still love you! What an awesome God we serve**
There weren't all tears this weekend. Well, tears of sadness that is.
There were tears of joy as well!!
Saturday we got to go to the upstate and celebrate the engagement of my sweet cousin and her fiance!
It was a bittersweet celebration because Friday her uncle lost his battle with cancer and went to be with Jesus. So while you're praying for me- say a prayer for my family and their hearts today as they say goodbye!

Love my sweet Wyatt!!

The Beautiful Couple!

Wyatt and Jess

Playing with a pretty princess!!

I made a new friend!!

Road trip with Mommy!

 Someone knew mom needed snuggles yesterday...
Tried to focus my time on me and celebrated hitting the 103 pounds lost mark!!

Thanks for listening dear friends...


Melissa said...

New reader from Photo Dump Monday's. I am sorry you're in pain, keep your head up. God and the people around you will provide you with the strength you need. I hope your week gets better. BTW, I have to tell you that you rock, 100+ pounds lost?!?!? You are amazing. I have lost 25 since the first of the year but 100+ wow! You are a strong person. Keep telling yourself that. xoxo

Anonymous said...

Congrats on the weight loss! You look great. Keep it up.

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